The hat I'm wearing is holding my hair from blowing all over the place, he asked me to wear it because he said it made me look hot, hah! I can't help but think as I am on this long bike ride with him that this could be our life together...peaceful trips to the country together, silent happiness in enjoying the scenery, enjoying the wind and the sun, being close to one another.



It has been almost 2 weeks since Man in Waiting and I have spoken (read here for what happened the last time we spoke). He sent me a nice e-mail, I sent him a couple notes as well. It's not going anywhere, nor will it ever, I am ready to move on.

In the meantime I have been getting closer with Boy Wonder. We went for a long bike ride Friday night...it was so nice being that close to him. Yeah know, I don't even feel like writing about him. He really pissed me off today and since I've been spending all my free time with him I haven't had time to post anything new.

I wrote this 2 weeks ago and am just now posting it. Not sure why Boy Wonder pissed me off...it doesn't matter. We are still hanging out just as much, I can't stop, I like him that much. It's easy. More on that later though.

Were meant to lose the people we love, or how else do we know we care for them...

They called him the guy with tattoos on his arms, the tall skinny guy, the guy with the perfect rowing body...they were talking about my Man in Waiting. I had asked one of my new teammates, as I had just joined a rowing team(I will be the coxswain, more on that later), to ask him if he wanted to sit in as they had a boat of seven but needed eight. I hoped he would join, he belongs on the water, he moves beautiful in a boat. He just finished up doing yoga though, he was relaxing on the deck. I was nervous to ask him.

He joined us. He was lead stroke. I joined the coach as he was teaching me terminology and rules of the river. I couldn't take my eyes off my Man in Waiting. He looked amazing, strong. He is actually 40 years old, 13 years older than me.

I joined the team on the sweep a little bit, the coach pulled the cox and put me in. I was sitting right across from Man in Waiting. He was my coach on that short trip. I listened to him, as unsure as I was, I felt comfortable, knowing that I was in charge of 8 other people, knowing he was there to help me.

When the team was finished, I waited for my Man in Waiting, I wanted to see him, talk to him, but I didn't know where to start. Women were staring at him, waiting there turn, even men were staring at him, jealous of his confidence and that women were not looking at them...

I stopped myself from speaking to him, I didn't want my teammates to know that we were familiar with one another, I wanted to give him a chance to talk to the other women that were there.

The prettiest girl there, tall, lithe, blond, and slightly eccentric could not take her eyes off of him. She wanted to talk to Man in Waiting so bad, I felt sorry for her that she was so obvious. While they were conversing I talked to some other people and finished my beer. I had asked him earlier if he needed a ride home as he road his bike to the boathouse, he said yes. I walked past Man in Waiting and the lithe blonde to the ladies room, as I came out she was gone and he was calling my name.

We fit his bike in my truck(SUV, I hate the word though) and I talked the whole way to his house. I told him everything that had happened that day and how much I have been working, but how happy it has made me. He smiled at me, later he told me it was because he enjoyed seeing me excited.

When we pulled up to his house, I didn't want to see him go in. I wanted to hold him and tell him how much I missed him.

We talked instead. A good, long talk.

So much was said, maybe too much. I realize that I loved him too early, but I love him still. There is something about my Man in Waiting. We might never be together and I may never understand him, nor may he ever understand me. He wait's for now, he wait's for me to figure out what I want, who I want, if it's him or Boy Wonder, or whom ever.

There is a lot more to this story, but it's time for bed.

Birthday Time!

My Lovely Boy turned 3 years old today! Can you believe it, 3-years-old!?

Sometimes I wonder how I got here, to this place, on my own, supporting myself and the love of my life. I can't explain why it has worked out so great, but it has.

I couldn't be happier to have a 3 year old little boy! He is smart, like when he tells me I am doing something wrong and I am! He has a sense of humor, telling me the wrong color of something only to say he is "kidding". He also is the biggest cuddler I know. I totally get sucked into his "give me a kiss" and "but I love you", all of the time. HOW COULD I BE SO LUCKY TO HAVE SUCH AN AMAZING KID!

As difficult as being a parent can be sometimes, I count my lucky stars everyday that I have a happy, healthy little boy. Hopefully, I will figure this blog thing out soon and dedicate an entire post to all of the cute things he says and maybe even post a few pics...nah...

Work it Out

I like to run, I run about 15 miles a week which averages about 3-4 miles a day depending on how many days I get out. I've been working on increasing my endurance and mileage each week, like really working at it. My goal is to run 5 miles next weekend and increase a 1/2 mile each week after.



Running has become an obsession for me, the feeling I get is un-explainable. I have heard of "runners high", this euphoric feeling that runners can get...it can be different for everyone, some people equate it to being like an orgasm, others say they feel as thought they are in some type of trance state. Regardless, I like it and I am going to continue to run.



Lately, Boy Wonder and I have been running at least twice a week with one another. It is nice to share something I love to do with someone else who appreciates it just as much. I am confused though. Is the great feeling I am getting being around Boy Wonder attributed to the fact that we exercise a lot with one another? For example, we ran yesterday morning and then went to yoga in the afternoon...am I getting "runner's high" while I am around him, is that why he is so appealing to me, because working out together puts us in a constant good mood???

I don't think it ia a bad thing, at least not for now...